last week a guy got out of his car ahead of me on my right, saw me coming, and decided to swing open the rear driver-side door anyway to grab his suitcase. nearly hit me. my usual response is just ‘dude’ or ‘f-ck, watch it’. somehow, ‘hey GUY, watch the door!’ came out of my mouth. i’ve never called someone ‘guy’.
then i decided to park my bike and walk behind him on the sidewalk giving stink-eye to the back of his head. i had a little free time to be a creeper. hopefully he remembers the creepy lady that followed him down the street the next time he nearly doors somebody.
(And a long time later I finally come back to say…)
Thanks for these responses! We asked the same question on Facebook, but yinz are wittier. ;)
Gonna compile some of the best and put them in the next issue of Bicycle Times (#26).
By the way, this wins my vote for “the nuclear option”:
mlinwood25 wrote:If somebody is all over me with the yelling and screaming and I can’t resist responding, here is one thing I thought of following an altercation with a car and have used since several times:
“No wonder why (he/she) left you.”
While it has nothing to do with driving, chances are it will hit a nerve.
last night, riding outbound Penn near Children’s Hospital, someone used the left-turn lane to pass me at 44th. Of course they got caught at the light at 45th, so when I caught up and passed them, i said “Boy, _that_ sure saved you a lot of time…”
(another favourite, when someone guns it past me in traffic: “yeah, man, go get that red light!” …)